...I feel like I got a pharmaceutical gumball machine strapped to my head,

making twice daily deliveries.

my mental pillness requires sodium valproate, lithium and Seroquel.

...at just safe levels....at least that's what 'they' tell me

for so long I resisted more medication after so many terrible experiences on things like antidepressants and barbs...

but I got myself all backed into a corner didn't I!

I kept cracking right up!

and now?...it's unbelievable the combo seems to be helping me adjust to life.

this does not mean I have control over my life ...NO WAY... or even anything like control over my emotional decisions...

basically?... I still screw up just the same but I don't seem to go into a psycho panic and turn already uncomfortable things into outright disasters.

...which is exactly why I have this medical gumball smiley facehugger strapped to my head