I'm new in this part of therapy so I'm sorry if I'm not getting all the lingo right. My T uses IFS & how it relates to my 'parts' that surround my inner self. She said she doesn't like the term DID but I am somewhere on the dissociative scale. As of right now I don't have any alters but definite 'parts' that are seperate from me. I find it very confusing. I used to dissociate a great deal but I'm getting better w/ some new skills to stay present. I feel like I really have to fight sometimes to stay present. When I lose time does that mean I might have an alter? It makes me suspicious. I do notice in my journal that I change from 'I' statements to 'you' statements so I don't know if that means anything. I don't wanto read into anything, but also am trying to be more aware of what I'm doing.

I'm so very appreciative of everyone's posts here. They've been extremely helpful. I'm having trouble trying to find info to read about bec most of what I find is DID w/ alter info & I think I'm looking for DDNOS. I guess that could fall anywhere on the spectrum scale.

I don't think I fully understand attachment either. I try very very hard not go get any type of attachment w/ a T. I've had to stop seeing a male T bec of transference. Now I see 2 females & I can't even hug them when they offer bec I don't think I could stand to b touched. I want it desperately, but feel it could lead to me trusting too much & getting burned as always. I feel I have to keep a certain amount of walls up for self protection. I also feel that if someone touches me like my T I could have a total meltdown & that would b horrible. I can't let that happen.
Am I supposed to get attached to them on purpose? Are they supposed to fill in the gaps that a parent left open? I don't like that vulnerability.

Any ideas? Would live to hear them.
Thanks