I used to feel those kinds of jealous feelings all the time and it has caused a lot of destruction in my closer relationships. I've always been an overly jealous person naturally and it sounds like you may be too. I feel for your struggle.

For me, after years of experiencing those emotions and working hard at changing my perspectives, it has gotten a lot better. It still effects me but it is a lot more manageable now. I hope you can find the same peace about it as I have.