I wasn't sure what category to put this under. It kinda sounds like a dissociative episode to me but I could still remember what happened? There have been several times where I have lost complete control of my actions and thoughts. Nothing out of the ordinary happens before these moments. I feel normal and then all of a sudden something snaps.
My thoughts are usually cluttered and fast, but when I lose control or whatever it's like my thoughts stop. There's only one very slow thought at a time. Whatever I was thinking about before is gone from my mind.
One of the first times this happened I was in school with my friends and I was going to give my friend a high five but instead my hands found the way to her throat and I started strangling her. I snapped out of it before I actually did damage but it freaked her out and I played it off as a joke.
I cannot control myself at all when this happens. It's like I'm pushed into the backseat of my mind, yet I can still see, feel, and hear what I'm doing. I have noticed my hearing gets a bit muffled, like I'm wearing ear muffs. I also remember what I've done afterwards.
These episodes usually happen a few times a month. I've tried to do research about it but I couldn't really find anything so I would really appreciate someone's input on this. Thank you.