First some background.......

now as we all know society wants us to bathe regularly, and wear lots of things that REALLY SMELL AWFUL. people who do not know the history of "Tiolet Water" (Eu D' Tiolet) will tell you that perfume deodorant etc was invented to be used after you bathe, when in fact it was invented in the olden days (not sure which century but in france I think) to cover the oder of having not bathed.

that being said we are pressured by advertising companies, social pressures etc to do this and use this awful stuff. now here is where you all will judge me, but I will say it anyway......

most folks I have talked to tell me that they feel refreshed when they get out of the shower/bath.

because of my depression etc I do not much care about my appearance, but what makes it worse is that when I take a shower/bath I feel like I have just been worked over by a thug with a baseball bat! and forget about cologne, I would rather stink like S*** than put that foul stuff on me so consequently I am not the cleanest/freshest smelling person because it is just SO HARD to step into that tiny ring with "Bubba" and his ball bat just to try to get clean. (and yes before you ask I drowned as a toddler, tho not to unconscness so I have a more than healthy respect for water, but not a fear of it.)

so here is the question I put to you the community:

I know that this post will get those judgemental looks, no worries I am used to it.

but......

am I the only one in the world that has this problem?

(sure feels like it, not to mention getting ostracized for the results of this whatever this is)

side note: just another twist of the downward spiral of the self strengthening lonliness/depression cycle.....