I had to make a WalMart run this morning. I had virtually nothing in the house to eat. I bent down to get something off a bottom shelf and couldn't get back up. My legs have been hurting terribly and swelling for the last two weeks and there I was stuck. I finally managed to stand by grasping the shelves and pulling myself up while praying the whole shelving unit didn't come tumbling on top of me. I toddled around and finished shopping and then rushed off to visit Mom in the hospital.

When I got there she was tired. She was demanding today. She wants to go home but she still can't walk or do anything for herself. The nurses had to come in an lift her up in bed.

I thought about having to stay and take care of her and I started feeling like I was smothering and the first thing I knew I was having a full panic attack. I went to talk to the nurse about Mom's condition and to let her know that I can't lift Mom. The entire time my family and Mom have been there, no one mentioned that I can't lift Mom. They told the nurses and Drs that I would stay with her, but they didn't tell them my health is not good.

I becamed so panicked trying to explain it that I felt like I was going to pass out at the nurse's feet. I am feeling quite overwhelmed right now.

Jan