Very depressing, so read at your peril.

I'm sure listening to depressing music has done me no favors tonight, but neither has losing 200GB+ of data, a lot of which being very personal. I cling onto so much stuff, and it's just, ... why? I'm going to ****ing die anyway, so why bother? Not to mention, as I so wonderfully reminded myself, data can be lost in a huge amount of ways. I just feel like crap. I've not *** in 4 years or so, but right now I just got a strong urge to, and imagined, ... things. I haven't felt this lost in a long time. I feel hopeless, like there's no ****ing point in anything. Why do I bother. Even this is pointless, ... so what, you'll see this, and I'll have accomplished, what exactly? Still going to die, I will still be alone, miserable, and angry at so much. I've still let people down. I've still been let down. Nothing will change that. I feel completely powerless. I'm getting therapy for my OCD, and that's suppose to be a good thing? How much of my life is going to be wasted, trying to be like those normal people out there? I've already wasted 27 years, like this. Maybe I need to just have kids, and get a sense of life from that, but oh wait, .. I can't, .. because I'm a ****tard, and relationships scare the crap out of me, ... perfect recipe for a family. But of course, I can't talk about this in therapy, because that's just for OCD. ¬_¬