I left after 31 years of verbal and physical abuse. The book that saved my life: The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans....If you read it you will think she wrote that book just for you....and about you.

I would suggest reading that book and also getting into counseling for yourself. Abuser s rarely change unless they get into their own therapy and they really don't think they have a problem; everyone else does. Abuse is literally brainwashing; that is why you feel so confused. There is a "cycle of violence" wheel; you can look it up on the internet......