If you can't put words to it, try some other mode of expression. Maybe art work would help. That helps me when I can't give words to my pain. Coloring, drawing, clipping from magazines, whatever you can find some relief from.

I recently was able to delay a cutting episode by several days. I opened up a magazine and used a razor blade to cut out body parts. I chose body parts that expressed something to me. Maybe it sounds wierd, but cutting that skin gave some relief even if it wasn't as much as hurting my own self. And you can put the magazine on top of something, maybe a cutting board, so you can put a lot of pressure on the blade. That helps vent physically. If nothing else, it served as a distraction for me to keep me busy.

I also suggest you post this post on the self-injury board. I don't mean to say I have a problem with you posting it here. Not at all! So don't misunderstand me on that. I just say if you post about the urges on the si board, more people will generally reply because more have been there, have had the urges to cut.

I hope you're hanging in there! If you're hurting again, please feel free to post. We are all here for you!

(((((((((((((((((((((((((wisewoman))))))))))))))))) <------- only if ok

SweetCrusader

"Blessed be the cracked, for they let in the light"
-Author Unknown