What Christina said. I don't know how long you've been diagnosed, but for me it was a year-and-a-half before I finally started figuring out what was me and what was BP. Now I don't have to do the daily gut-checks ("okay, what mood am I in today?") or really even think about it much at all---the meds keep me pretty steady now, and even on days like today where I'm all over the map emotionally, I no longer assume it's the beginning of a new mood episode.

That takes time, as well as acceptance of the diagnosis. It all got easier for me when I stopped fighting the idea that I was bipolar and just said "OK, this is my reality now, I have to take these pills and learn to live with what IS and not what I want it to be." You'll get there. Just breeeeathe.......