I would also question anyone who would say "prove your love by having sex with me". I feel for you. For some reason, I spent most of my teenage and young adult life trying to gain love and respect from friends who were male and boyfriends through sex or by acting sexy. It is tough because you honestly believe that it will make you feel better- as you know from your last experience, those situation almost always ends up making you feel worse. Decide what is right for you- although it sounds like you already know- you said you just CAN'T because of everything that's going on with you. I'd say, there's your answer.