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I lie.............I do not tell him if I bang my head. I just tell him the urges are strong and I fantasize about it. He does not even know that is how I self harm. I used to burn but do not want to deal with hiding scars so head banging works just fine.
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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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