First and formost take care of you and if you have Children make them a priority as well. If it's hard to do it for you do it for the Children. Believe me I know it's hard, but it is time for you to look deep inside and ask yourself the big question. Do I want to be in this same situation 10,20 or even 30 years from now? I can tell in your wrighting/post to us, that you are reaching out your hand seeking words of comfort and ya know what I am grabbing it as we all are. I see in you a strong loving person with a big heart reaching out for help. I'm glad that you are here with us. You can pm me if you would like.
I have been in a similar situation as you.
I took that step. Now I am alot happier with myself for doing it and I am able to be a better mom to my daughter.