Okay, so I finally remarried after being divorced for five years from a husband who was physically abusive. I never got over my husband. My current husband turns out to be emotionally distant and abusive. For example, just because I had worn shoes in my kitchen and made a scuff-mark on the floor, he put his dirty shoes on and deliberately rubbed them repeatedly on the sofa to teach me a lesson. At the same time I have a desire to go back to the husband who was physically abusive but who has been under treatment for bipolar illness and is doing much better. We still talk regularly and still love each other. However, he is on social security disability and has nothing to offer me. I would basically have to support him. With my current husband I have financial security but a great deal of emotional abuse. With my last husband there is no guarantee that he won't become violent again if we actually went back to each other. Yet he keeps putting pressure on me to divorce my current husband and go back to him. He's convinced we belong together. I've been with him for twenty years and he's the only man I ever really loved at such a deep level. I know I'm acting crazy. I'm trying to go on with my life but every step I take forward I take two steps backward. Any suggestion would be appreciated. My counselor seems to feel that I don't really love my ex -husband and that I am addicted to him instead. This is messing up my life and the life of my grown kids who would never want to see me go back to him.