Considering your previous marriage, I agree with Open Eyes.
You need to do what is best for you; and in this case, from what I've read, is that neither of these men are what you need.
You've been through physical abuse and were able to escape from it. The emotional abuse, while it may seem different, is still abuse. And there's no reason for you to settle for that. You need to find someone who cares about you.
Also, yes, your children should also weigh in on your decision. Do they know about your current husband and his emotional abuse? And do they fully understand the physical abuse from your previous husband?
It seems that they might have gone through it if you had gone through it (considering they lived with you, etc.) and from their eyes, it could be a different perspective.
In honesty, it seems to me like you want to "settle" for your ex-husband. But you shouldn't feel that way.
You're a strong person that has been through a lot and deserves a hell of a lot more, excuse my language.
And you shouldn't settle. You deserve better.