((((IG))))) Of course it hurts and of course it matters! I so understand about being stressed about the process itself on top of the stuff that brought you into therapy. You described it very well here and I completely understand what you're saying. Let's hope it was a miscommunication. How was her tone like the time she said "well we'll see if you're needy and demanding"? Let's hope it's just bad phrasing and she meant it as just "reality testing", a different approach to helping you? Was she trying to agree with what you said? No matter what, I can understand how it can feel hurtful when you already feel so bad about yourself and so sensitive. You just needed extra warmth and reassurance maybe? I'm not sure what's going on but hope you're able to bring it up.... As for the formal approach, can you ask your T about this, too? Mine is mostly warm but some days she is more cool and formal, I think that's when she has a lot going on in her life and is in a bad mood. ...? (((IG)))))