>> This probably sounds selfish and kind of childish, but everyone who's burned and abandoned you will see your abituary, then realize it's too late, you're gone and there's nothing they can say to you.

That is certainly not unusual to feel that way. But think about it... killing yourself to punish others is absolutely the WORST among lots of bad reasons to commit suicide. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face.

When I feel that way (believe me, I do sometimes) I always try to fight through it, use it as an excersize of anger without any plans at all to go through with it, stop and think why their attention means so much to me, think of the effect to them in the long run... lots of things other than really doing it.

It is OK to feel that way lost, but don't ever let yourself come close to acting on it. Call a hotline, confront your friends and tell them how you feel, tell other people how you feel... punch a pillow... do whatever you need to do to get that anger out without hurting yourself.

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