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Old Oct 10, 2013, 12:49 AM
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will i get married will i get married is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2013
Location: India
Posts: 55
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trippin2.0 View Post
Your initial post and your response to the feedback received does not add up...

You ask in your thread title where is this relationship going, posters have made it clear it has already embarked on a very unhealthy and toxic path.

Then you ask what should I do?

Nothing you do will make him treat you better, others have pointed this out and advised accordingly, still your last post indicate that you did not receive the responses you wanted...

What is it then that you seek here?
Do you want to know how to stay with an abuser?

If so, the answer is simple;
Give up on any notion that your relationship will improve. Give up on the idea that any of your actions will result in being treated as a valued humanbeing. Give up on being an indepedent person and an independent thinker. Accept that you are his posession and he will treat you as he pleases. Accept that you an your happiness are not important to him. Accept that you are at the mercy of his moods. Accept that his treatment of you will deteriorate and that the good times will slowly decrease and then become non existant. Accept defeat.

I sadly dated my abusive ex for a longtime before he progressed from your bf's form of abuse to outright physical abuse, so I know what I speak of.

Btw, your last bit in your post is incorrect. You can leave him, you are choosing not to.
There is a HUGE difference. Cannot means being unable to, as far as I can tell you are not chained to a floorboard so the ability is there. The will however is not.

The fact that your are choosing not to, leads me to ask you to please seek therapy for yourself to explore why you choose this when life has so much better to offer.

PS. I found real love after finally deciding I was too good to be treated like shyt.
True love is a 2 way street, consisting of partners who love, respect and trust eachother. Partners who work toward making a good life for eachother, with eachother. Partners who want what's best for eachother.

What you have described in your relationship is anything but, no matter how nice the good times feel.

I know I'm strange,
But what are you? .....

Trippin2.0,
Thank you very much for your reply. Yes you are right - love is both ways. Just the problem is - my ex behaved in pretty much the same way, only less tormenting than this - makes me feel like all men will be infuriated with any sorts of past and I love him so much and in all ways I feel scared to walk out of the relationship. I know that I could do so much more if I am out of the relationship but I am just scared - as it is, there are enough people talking behind my back saying things I haven't done. I am worried what will happen if this relationship ends. I am from a conservative family and just no one will understand me. My BF is fine when he is with me or kissing me or making love but even then suddenly he brings up saying I am a used person and have no value at all. I am just worried that whomsoever I eventually end up with, will be like this and so I am just putting up with this - scared to walk out but also scared to stay.