Hi Mania Trance
Thank you for your feedback. You have given me the courage to tell my psychiatrist what I have just done. I know she will be disappointed but she is there for a reason, to listen and help me and yes, get me back on track. What is your opinion on the guy that I have...or think I have...fallen totally in love with? Maybe it is his rejection to stop the affair whereas if I stopped it, it would be a different story. I want to be friends with him, almost like trying to prove myself that I am not a psycho and just act "normal" when we get together. Should I tell him I have Bi-polar to explain myself? I feel like I need to have these excuses for my behavior so he doesn't think I am as emotional and crazy all the time. This whole thing is a freaking mess. At the beginning he was so hot for me now he just thinks I am crazy and probably wished he never got involved with me to begin with.