Quote:
Originally Posted by Trippin2.0
See this is where your thinking pattern is wrong.
You ARE able to, you are not allowing yourself to. The more you think this way, the more true it becomes in your mind.
If your parents are of the understanding type, why not try and reason with them. Meaning have them look out for suitors, but that you don't have to agree to marry unless you think it may be a good match...
If this is an option I strongly suggest you try it, and NOT divulge your past too quickly. My reasoning is that your parents may know a better breed of men, and may just present you with a suitable man, one that will treat you with the respect you deserve. I can't honestly imagine any good father marrying his daughter off to a scumbag.
Also, try not being sO open about your past. A partner really doesn't need to know every single detail of the life you lead before him, share only what is relevant to the relationship.
See in your case, virginity is relevant, you can say you had a longterm bf, you thought it was leading toward marriage and thus you felt it safe enough to have sex with him.
Only that.
You don't need to name and number who you did what with, it doesn't benefit anybody really and has already opened up so many opportunities for you to get hurt.
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Yes I had considered doing just that before my bf came along. I was pulling my life together, getting on well with people, creating better social circles and in general, life was good till he came and everything went up and came crashing down to the ground, big time.
Last night we had a long talk. I told him that I had to give up just about every single thing about me to be with him and we can't live if we keep dwelling in the past. He says that he doesn't mind it and he just wants to find if I am still hiding anything else from him and that to be with him, I had to listen to every word he said.
Every time I think of breaking up, or tell him to leave me alone, he comforts me and I just melt when he does that. I just couldn't utter the words to leave him because I keep wishing things will be okay and I spend hours searching for ways to get things on track with him. Why do breakups have to be so hard - I normally hate to end things with anyone - be it friendship or a relationship. I always hate to say anything to hurt someone but I end up getting hurt bad.
I am just trying so much - the relationship is just 3 months old and I feel like I've been in it for 3 years with the amount and intensity of emotions I am feeling. I just want to keep it smooth - so he/I don't get hurt anymore - be it whether we breakup/stay together.