I know exactly how you feel. Having these thoughts about being gay does not make you gay, seeing as OCD puts thoughts in your mind that are abstract and have no relation to what you really intend or believe in. I have thoughts of cursing people or people dying. Like I sometimes imagine people I'm talking to at that very moment dying as I speak to them so I can get to the next thing, although I never actually want their death, the thought just pops into my mind. You should seek help if it's every night you have these rituals. But it does sometimes leave you, as my rituals have, because my mind just thought, what's the point in thinking that anymore? At the time of having the rituals, it feels like they're necessary, but at some point they won't bother you, I promise, and you won't feel compelled to do them.

I wish you the best.