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Originally Posted by monalisasmile
so it really depends on the client and their reasons for being in therapy!
I personally still don't see how it is appropriate under any context. It wouldn't feel real because we only see them for an hour a week and yes we might be truly ourselves with that t but we can't possibly really know the other to say that.
I personally wouldn't say it to anybody in my life only a significant other.
If a thinks it will help a client and only says it because of that reason they aren't being genuine. Love is such a string word with lots of different meanings to different people.
Here in my country if a therapist said that they would be arrested- I am not criticising anyone's t here but I would not allow mine to say it. I would not accept it.
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I think those words are not so weighted the same way to every individual. Coming from a very affectionate family, sharing "I love you" with each other very casually is just the way we are, so those words don't stay confined to just "love"/intimate relationships with significant others, but are also freely shared between extended family members and close friends in a completely platonic, supportive, friendly context.
In my case, my T knows that about me and my personality. He knows I don't have any transference feelings for him, no abandonment or dependency issues. He knows I don't overthink things or misinterpret friendly gestures as something more than what they are at face value, so he knows I can receive those words and not be bothered by them. I am sure he has other clients he would never consider saying those words to because it would open up a huge can of worms in their therapy. Again, it comes down to context and the relationship dynamic.
It seems completely odd that a therapist would actually be arrested for saying those words. Since when are words alone a crime? I can see the words combined with inappropriate sexual relations with a client being a criminal offense, but the words alone? Seems overboard.