i think you need to come clean but also tell whoever you see of your concerns about the meds. they will work with you to find the right meds for you. you don't have to take something if you don't like the side effects of being slowed down.

honestly, it sounds like you are playing a lot of games. your friend isn't treating you but she is diagnosing you. that really is treating you. you need to go see someone who isn't a friend. like sunnie said a psychiatrist has a m.d. a psychologist has a phd. i don't know which your friend is from your description. of course a person can have more than one degree but a psychiatrist has to have a m.d. stop gaming people and tell them the full story and your concerns about being sharp enough to do your job. they are there to help you and work with you. also, have you considered going to a 12-step program? you would probably be really helped by narcotics anonymous or some other drug users support group.