allme Sorry to hear you are going through all of this right now. My heart bleeds for you, I feel your pain. Perhaps letting yourself feel free to cry is not such a bad idea right now. Its not good to hold in your grief, its completely acceptable to cry in this circumstances. Please don't do anything to hurt yourself, I am somewhat relieved to see you say you'll be okay. I hope your brother understands how hard of a time this is for you right now. You need all the support you can get. It seems like maybe things built up to get to this point, where it went beyond screaming and turned physical. I hope you can see that this is not the end of the world, every ending is a new beginning. Who knows maybe something good will come out of this incident? You never know if you give up, keep your head up.