So I'm about to call and cancel my T appointment for today. I'm telling her I have to work. I have a job with weird hours, so that isn't out of the ordinary.

My actual after-work plans involve a haircut and some grocery shopping. I just can't deal with this today. I don't want to deal with her again ever, actually, but I haven't worked up to being able to say that and defend my decision. So I'm just postponing it for a week.

Saying what I want, rather than playing go-along-to-get-along, is one of the central problems of my entire life. I'd rather keep the peace than stir the pot (unless somebody provokes me, and then what gets directed at them is *their* fault ). How do you work up the guts to be able to say, "you know, this just isn't working for me, I need to find somebody else"? I mean, it's ridiculous -- this would have been my 3rd appointment, it's not like I have years invested -- which is probably part of the problem, actually; I'm not comfortable with her yet. I just feel like a loser for not being able to be a grownup about this.

Ideas?

Candy