<font color="purple">Had a great therapy session last night.. Was able to separate myself from the "little" whose experiences/emotions I had been reliving over the past four days. I was able to embrace her, yet put a boundary up between her 'then' and my 'now' which was a very important thing for me to do. I have done it in the past when overwhelmed by dissociated experiences of my parts. In the moments I was experiencing the "baby's" trauma I was overwhelmed. I had not ever experienced anything so hard before. I was overtaken by "her" emotions and sensations. My therapist helped me to recall that I had the tools to help the "baby" yet keep myself in the 'here and now.'

She held me, let me put my head in her lap and on her shoulder, while she spoke to the "baby" who listened intently. As my therapist was holding me, I was holding the "baby." I repeated to her what my T was saying to me. What I was feeling flowed into that little one and allowed me to separate "my" emotions/sensations from "her" emotions/sensations. How grateful I am to have a T who cares so much about me that she hugs and accepts all the parts of me.

I am by no means finished learning what I need to from my "baby" part. But right now I am able to once again be present in the 'now' and see that life is not horrible/hopeless/helpless, those were "her" feelings. I see that I do need to learn from "her", that I need to take the time I need to with "her", that I can continue on in this life, that I have the strength inside of me, that I can cope and function in this life. How important that lesson was for me to learn tonight!

I don't think I'll need to go to that special program after all. I, with the help of my T, was able to discover that within me lies the strength to go on. For that I am truly thankful.

My therapist is an angel!

Thank you for all your wonderful caring support.
Peace
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