Thank you for all of the support and understanding. I can't tell you how great it feels to be able to have someone to talk to that understands how I feel. Most people I try and explain how I feel always give me the generic (you just need some rest) umm NO I've been "resting" for years.. I don't need "rest", I need to feel alive and feel like I have some amount of optimism about my day or my life. Otherwise i'm just walking around in a daze, going through the motions of living a life.

I guess maybe it is the "depression" but i'm not sure what meds might help with that? what is the cipralex? is that an anti-depressant? I've been on Celexa, Trazadone and wellbutrin in the past. They worked for awhile but then lost their effectiveness.