Hi Lunar - I'm really glad you found your way here. You'll meet some really nice folks here.

I know you've had some bad experiences with meds, but from what you are describing it does sound like your system is a little bit out of whack, so you may want to consider trying some new meds. You are describing what I'm sure you already know sound like psychotic symptoms, and depression, so that diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder sounds right on target. It's a tough road to walk, but people do improve their lives significantly with the right treatment!

Docs come up with new meds all the time, and maybe you just haven't found the right combo yet. Personally I tried MANY combos before I got the right mix for me. You didn't mention Zyprexa, and Topamax is relatively new for adding to a antipsychotic to prevent weight gain. It can decrease your appetite.

So, what I'm saying (I do tend to ramble), is to please talk to your support people about trying meds again. And stay on them long enough to really give them a chance - reporting all side effects of course.

And ...therapy. Talking to someone about all this is so important to staying on track. Again, so glad to meet you! Keep posting!!

Emmy

"Compassion is my religion" - The Dalai Lama