Thanks for all your replies. You helped a lot.

Apparently his first wife (35 years ago) had some kind of mental illness. She cheated, brought her boyfriends home in front of the kids, or stayed out all night, and was violent with him and the kids. He can't seem to figure out that I'm not like that. I sent him web links to read, explained everything about bp2 to him, etc. I think he doesn't want to understand. And yet, he has major depressive disorder, panic disorder, PTSD from the Viet Nam war, and is an alcoholic.

Time to write him off for good, I think.