Hermit, you are so correct. I was able to talk to T today. Bless her soul for putting up with my petty stuff. And more or less she said it is not aboutthe computer, it is about the control and the compromise. And he wants full total control. the computer represents a way for him to exert his power, for me it is not about the computer it is about allowing someone to continue to dictate to me what I can and cannot do. I am a 39 year old woman for crying out loud. Not a 5 year old where daddy says "NO you can't play with the computer because I said so."

I asked the T am I being redicilious when it comes to standing my ground on this and she said NO. You gotta stand up for your self sometime and this time is just as good as any. It will never be easy in the beginning. So by all means do. And if the relationship comes to an end she will be here to help me. So I feel some better about things. I still hope he never brings it up again.