I feel like that, right now. I know why I want to do it, ... it's to cover up OCD anxiety and all my other crap, ... self-harming would take center stage, thus enabling me to focus on it, and not the things that really bother me. Problem is, if I were to do it, I would be letting a lot of people down, worrying some, and I would probably screw up my chance of getting supported housing, so kind-of can't, either way. >.> What I find weird, is that for the past 4 years or something, I've had the very tools I used to use, in my toolbox in my bedroom, and still I stubbornly don't do 'it'.