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I don't think it's about if we deserve to get our needs met or if a therapist must fill/meet our needs: it's more about accepting and not being ashamed of our needs while at the same time learning *how* best to meet them. Sometimes it's necessary to learn more effective ways of getting our needs met, but this doesn't mean we should feel or be made to feel ashamed of those very needs. I think therapists' boundaries can feel shaming sometimes, but (except for the really sucky therapists) I think the point is to channel how we seek to get them met in healthier, and ultimately, more effective ways. I think it can seem sometimes that 'boundaries' = shame, but it doesn't have to be that way -sometimes that's just how we perceive/feel it.
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