First and foremost, you should get some professional help; I'm sorry for the generic, predictable response, but it's said for a reason. You've got this early, which is a bonus.

This and more, is something I get on a very regular basis, and has tortured me for something like 15 years.

Please get some help. I don't know where you live, but if it's the UK, see your GP, describe what you've said here, and they will take it from there. (they will have heard it all before, no doubt) I'm quite hopeful that, with the right help, you will be fine. CBT might help, if that has been going on for a little while, and they deem it an appropriate course of action, but IDK - they might suggest something different.

This is how I see your situation:

There's 4 paths in-front of you. From left to right, is path 1, 2, 3, and 4. You always go down paths 2 and 3, always ignoring the others, because they are generally and universally wrong. For whatever reason, you found yourself mischievously sticking your leg into the 1st and 4th path, almost as a test (like you do to see if the water is hot) and now that you've done that, suddenly those paths are clear to you, and you notice them like you never did before; now you fear you will walk down those paths. I think you just need (something like CBT) to teach yourself how to get those two paths out of your peripheral vision, or to accept those paths are there, but to eventually ignore them. Similar to how an intrusive thought works: you notice it, you give it meaning, it becomes prominent, you stress about it, it gets worse, ... lo 'n behold, you then end up with OCD, so you need to learn (again, with CBT, like I'm in) to eventually ignore those thoughts again; to not give them meaning.

Hope that helps.