I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year now. It was only until a few months ago that I started having episodes of jealousy and distrust. I'm constantly bringing up his past. He was engaged many years ago, the relationship went sour...long story short he ended up cheating. I knew this going in, in fact he was very honest about it when the topic came up during the beginning of our relationship. He was sorry that it happened and vowed to be a changed man. He's been nothing but great to me, yet when I blow up in arguments I use this against him. It's almost like putting him on a guilt trip and I know it's wrong.

I've called him every name in the book, belittled his manhood, accused him of flirting with other females, the list goes on. He's not my first "victim" in fact I've treated all serious intimate relationships the same.

I've recently started researching BPD and think I'm a prime candidate. Control issues, jealousy rampages, the love you-hate you bits. I'm seeking self control, as it's something I seem to lack. I really don't want this to be another failed relationship, but it will be if I continue lashing out.

Am I just as "crazy" as he says or can this be fixed? I'd appreciate feedback.