I'm very sorry you're feeling so distressed and hopeless. Please reach out for professional help and avoid making this fatal decision. Life can change and you never know if things could get better for you. I had an older brother end his life 5 yrs ago and won't get into how devastating this is for family and friends. I'll leave you some links and I'll be sending positive vibes to you. I care about you.

Suicide Helpline

Suicide: Read This First

How to cope with suicidal feelings - Mind