Thanks so much for taking the time to respond. Admittedly, I am having a very hard time accepting the comparison of myself to a rapist for thinking it was safe for me to talk about my own assault. Honestly, I am having a very difficult time with that one.

I am sure it could or may have triggered her, as she has brought up her own sexual assault at least a few times with me, although I have never shared my own story with her until the other night. In fact, she has brought up many of her own stories. All of these years, I have NEVER felt "triggered" or uncomfortable with other rape survivors sharing their stories, and have even been there for them and listening, to whatever it is they need to share or not, and I have never found the need to turn and twist that moment around to myself.

Thing must have changed since my assault, because I have always been mindful to support people who need discuss their assault within a safe and intimate setting - which is what I thought it was, among someone with whom I have shared my apartment and life for 2 months, and have listened to endless stories of her woes, background, issues daily afflictions. The second person is a new but good friend, and she didn't mind being there for me.

I never planned to bring anything like this up, and actually never have - it was a first for me and I guess I very much did learn my lesson, thanks very much.

I have always come from this standpoint when dealing with the sexual assault of others:

"Allow your loved one to make choices for him or herself. Being raped is the ultimate type of loss of control over their environment. Don't step in and try to take charge - allow your friend or loved one to make their own decisions as a way to begin the road to empowerment.

Ask - rather than assume you know best - how best you can help your friend. This can help your friend begin the path to recovery and begin to rebuild trust.

If you are having a hard time coping with the feelings that the rape has stirred up inside you, consider talking to a therapist or counselor about how to manage your OWN feelings."

- See more at: How To Help Someone Heal From A Rape or Sexual Asault - Band Back Together

-See more at: How to support a rape survivor

"Support you can offer:

Listen to her.

seems hard to comprehend. Women's experiences are often denied and minimized.

Tell her you are glad she could tell you about it.

Respect that she may need to focus solely on herself and her needs for awhile.

Let her know you are there for her.

Reassure her that you are there to talk to if she wants to.

Allow her to make her own decisions.

Support the choices she makes.

Recognize the harm that was done to her.

Realise that her feelings are ok.

Respect her need to express these feelings.

Let her choose which family members or friends she wishes to disclose to.

Ask how best to support her.

Acknowledge your limits.

Respect her privacy.

Be patient.

Respect that her healing may take time, space and energy.

Let her talk. Survivors often need to go over things many times, allow space for this.

Try to avoid:
Ignoring what has happened to her.

Taking charge or being over-protective.

Blaming, accusing or judging her.

Telling anyone else about what happened without her permission.

Expecting her to deal with your feelings."