Hello & Welcome, Piscesgurly.
You have been through much. By all means, follow Bronzeowl's suggestion to investigate Seasonal Affective Disorder. Also, you may find value in visiting other forums here, particularly
As much as you wish to overcome these struggles on your own, at some point you may need a doctor or at least an ally. Please stay safe.
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My dog
mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.