Today has been...weird, but not necessarily in a bad way. Around seven or eight months ago, I became very close with one of my friends. We talk every day, and each time I instantly feel better, even if I'm having a particularly good day. Every time I see him it's just...magical, and I replay our conversations in my head again and again. I'm in love with him, but there are several reasons (most of which are definitely personal for him, so I won't share) why we can't be together. Every time I start thinking about the future with him, my heart breaks. But the good weird part is the sadness I'm feeling, the tears I'm experiencing, it's real. Not the agonizing, get this monster out of my head pain and tears, it's real sadness. I long for moments like these. Not that I want to feel this way about him, I don't, and I usually don't think about it, but having real sadness is so wonderful I don't know how to describe it.