Quote:
Originally Posted by My kids are cool
You don't have to tell her, actually. You could accept that you wanted to do this and did so. Own it and then move on with your life. [And please hear that in the non-judgmental, very kind way I mean it. I am truly not busting on you here.] Seriously, this does not have to be this huge deal. Put it behind you and just talk about what you want to talk about and let go of the guilt and self flagellation. Maybe one of the steps in getting over this thing with your T is to resist the urge to tell her everything, and keep working on not googling her, etc. One mistake does mean a total relapse. Back on the wagon, Woman!
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I think MKAC has nailed it. There has always seemed to me something very unhealthy in the feel of your need to do these things
and then tell your T about them. There's a confessional quality to it all that feels to me as if it feeds the unhealthy urge rather than diminish and get past it. The "confession" is like a reliving of the excited and obsessional feelings. Perhaps your motivation in telling is the excited experience of it, rather than gaining the insight to stop it. Let it go for at least a session and see how it feels. You can always tell her later if the pressure becomes unbearable--but you will have had the experience of observing and trying to control your feelings.