That's a bummer... I have had some of the some feelings as you about your wife not wanting to get with you. My situation isn't as bad as yours, I just want to be closer to my wife, and she doesn't need to be as physical, but we get together about once a week or so... My advice though is to figure out what it is she needs to feel loved by you and work on that. At the same time, you can nicely express what you need to her to be happy and ask her point blank if she'd be willing to do those things. If she says she isn't sure or doesn't know, then I think you should try to date other girls. If you're separated right now, then to me that's a green light to move forward... it may help you with your confidence. Also hit the gym, lose the weight... it will make you feel better about yourself which could totally help!