Quote:
Originally Posted by Lily5473
I have 3 sessions left with my t. I have developed intense feelings for her. And if I could have my way, I would love to get to know her outside of the therapeutic setting. I know it's called transference, but I don't think this is. I am genuinely attracted to her. I know she has faults, but I like those faults. She doesn't remind me of anyone in my past either. I don't want to act on my feelings or tell her because I respect the boundaries and I don't want to put her in an awkward position. On the other hand, however, I don't want to be left with these feelings once therapy ends. I want closure. I want to move on. I know I can never be with her. I've tried everything short of blatantly telling her that I have feelings for her. I've prepared a whole speech, but then she just focuses on one part of it. I know that she'll interpret my feelings as transference. And they're not. I am genuinely attracted to her and I want to get to know her better. Is it even possible to work through this in three sessions?
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sure its ok to tell a therapist you care about them....here in NY this kind of thing is called attachment not transference, unless the feelings towards the therapist is one where a person is feeling that way because they feel that way for someone else...
example here where I live and work If I like/care about my therapist for no other reason then I like my therapist for who she is and how she does things its attachment, if I like/care about my therapist because I am transferring my love for my wife to my therapist then its transference.
whether its transference or attachment here where I live and work it is ok to tell a therapist when you like, care, love them and would like to have an outside of therapy relationship. NY is one of the USA states that does allow for friendships after a client and therapist no longer have a business relationship.
you can find out if your location allows for this kind of thing by talking with your treatment providers or by contacting what ever agency over sees mental health ethics in your location.