it is normal to have suicidal thoughts. that doesn't automatically get you committed. it is only if your t thinks you are a danger to yourself that you get committed. do you have a plan that you can carry out? that is what will get you committed. I feared all my life getting committed and then one day it happened. I can say I enjoyed that because it was against my will, but I did go in once because my t talked me into it and it was a very good experience. it was a nice break from the world and a time for the pdocs to get me stabilized on meds and lots of groups to get me thinking differently. they let me out when I was ready to go and face the world again. so not so bad. I needed the coping skills I learned there. so it is not such a bad thing to talk to t about. please consider it.