Oh my gosh! That sounds like me 18 years ago. My then boyfriend broke off with me after a 2-year relationship because I wanted more from the relationship. He couldn't even say the M word.

Well, within a few months from that time, I met a new guy. Handsome, educated, and charming. After a few dates, we talked about past relationships. I told him about this 2-year relationship and how it was going nowhere and he didn't say much about it. Well, this old beau called a few weeks later and we met for lunch. I was so confused I started crying in a public restaurant where we had lunch. I later told the new beau about how we met for lunch. Well, that got the ball rolling I guess. He gave me a ring a few months later and want to get married 3 months after that! Well, I was so flattered that someone actually wanted to marry me, seemed really sure about what he wanted, that I said yes. Things moved way too fast. We got married within a year of first meeting.

Well, flash forward 18 years. Here I am, more loney than I have ever been in my life. Unhappy. IF it weren't for my two kids, I'd be out of here. And you know what, I still think about that old beau from time to time. I think we were more suited for each other. I didn't really know my husband when I married him. I thought I did, sure. But I was rushed into the marriage thing. He's like your fiancee. She feels threatened because that someone else is still in the picture.

You are only 21. I would advise (and I'm not an expert by any means) that you put off the ring exchange. Don't feel pressured like I. ONce you exchange the rings, this will escalate so fast you won't be able to think straight. And with your old flame, if you know you weren't happy, it won't get any better. Let that flame die out. Live each day anew. Meet new people. Don't make a mistake and marry someone because you're flattered sheproposed so quickly. She sounds like my husband. I can't think of the word -- inadequate, threatened, I don't know.

Try telling both of them you need some time to yourself right now, maybe set a time period like 6 months or whatever. If they're both gone by then, it was meant to be. Just don't feel pressured.