He is definitely abusive to you. Thing is everything about this guy says he is a controlling self-righteous [redacted]. He is possibly a guy that is into dominating his mate, and controlling her. One thing that a controlling person will do is isolate the mate - hence the willingness to let you to move to his country away from your network of friends and family. As soon as he felt he had "secured" his prize, that's when things changed, you see? Now that he's got you (he's assuming) trapped in his country, he no longer has to be the nice guy, the loving mate, the character that obviously got you hooked on him. His true colors are that of a cheater, a controller and abuser. He likes to have his cake and eat it too (other women, and have you at home waiting too). You have no say in this, he is the way he wants to be and at this point his reactions to your responses to his behavior says that he's not going to change that any time soon. If you're not married to him, you have no reason to stay. Get out. As fast as you can, do it faster.

All you have ahead of yourself is either giving in, losing yourself by becoming what he wants or years of fighting with him trying to get him to be what he should be -- while there are many many other men out there that are perfectly willing to treat you right.