Thanks for the recommendations. As to your reply, yes i was diagnosed with depression. I was given medication and while it made me feel better by making me number and more tired, it didn't help much with the actual problem. As for the rest, i don't really plan (at least for now) to give it any more tries into changing myself and pushing myself to do things i don't really enjoy just so that i can maybe "be slightly less broken" than i am right now.

Now on to what i mentioned earlier, i'm quite sure there's a few people who aren't necessarily in the same situation as me, but who are busy with work taking up most of their lives and also don't frequently go out to bars/clubs and whatnot, completely ignore their social life but at the same time would like to have someone to spend their limited offwork hours with and enjoy their company.

Problem is, i got no clue as to how i could find these sort of people, hence asking for advice. Thanks for the meetups.com suggestion, will check that later and see if it's something that would work towards my goal, and if i can find people from my country/city most importantly. Normal dating sites probably wouldn't work (or maybe they would?) no idea, so was hoping for a bit more help from that particular PoV. Again, even if i'd go out, it's not like i'm gonna meet interesting people just by having random walks around, with no group of friends/acquaintances and without going to socializing spots like i previously mentioned .. you get the idea.

And a bit offtopic...

I gave in and actually called an escort over. I'm gonna spare you the details, however i must say that it's hilarious (maybe wrong choice of words) how she managed to fix me more in a single day than a psychiatrist/psychologist couldn't in over 1 year of sessions.

That evening i was able to go out for a walk, alone, for a couple of hours, really far away from home, feeling great and with absolutely no worries about the world around me, the people (and yeah i live in a bad neighborhood as well so it's not all paranoia), not feeling dizzy, worried about my issues. It's like i went back in time to my normal self 9 years ago before any of these issues started ruining my life.

Obviously i don't want this to turn into a normal occurence since

a) it's quite expensive
b) it's not exactly what i'm looking for
c) it could end up messing me up even further in the "grand scheme of things" just having meaningless sex with random women all the time

Thanks.