feelings inside are like a big mucky mess all swirled around in a violent whirlpool dragging me downward. it stinks so much it's nauseating. it's dark and slimy and cold and penetrating. the sounds of agony are deafening but it's familiar. i try to fight my way out of it only to exhaust myself, so i close my eyes and go with it and get sucked under and then i'm drowning and in some sense thankful i don't have to fight any more......
naomi