Interesting thread. I envy my T in some ways, because he has done so much work on his own issues, he doesn't wish he was someone else, and he feels his wounds but doesn't wish he didn't have them - I want to get to that stage, too. (T seems to think it's possible. I don't believe him, not yet.)

I think that, if I had a female T, I might feel like I was competing with her - because I have a lot of issues with envy and comparison as they feed into my habit of fantasising and inventing different lives in my head. But I don't feel I want to be like my T, as we're quite different in a lot of ways. I asked if he reads a broadsheet newspaper that I, my husband and a lot of my friends read, and I was really irritated when he said no.

I have these issues more with friends than with my T. So Rainbow I do totally empathise with you, as I feel this, just not in therapy so much.