Quote:
Originally Posted by MASIMO
I woke up last night very anxious and worried about my T.
Worried that he was really sick, and feeling like I want to do something
to help him. Dont know if my intuition is telling me something or not.
I emailed him today asking how he was, telling him about last night, and
that I hope he is OK. How I'm on the fringes of his life, so I dont know how he is
like someone in his life would, but I still worry. Said it was a strange place to be.
Does anyone ever feel like they want to help their T? I'd like to make some chicken soup,
just comfort him like he comforts me when I'm sick. I know I cant cross that boundary
but I still feel like I want to know if he is OK. He feels like he is part of my life,
although he only gives me chicken soup for the soul.
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In the past, I had much stronger caretaking urges. Some of it was being an ACOA, having the sense that the world kind of rested on my shoulders, that I was the fixer, haha. I used to roleplay, as a child, that people I loved were sick and I'd take care of them all the time. Thank goodness that's mostly over. But, yes, if my therapist were sick, I would still feel concerned for her, and if there happened to be something helpful I could do, I would.
However, I understand that she has an external support system and is self-reliant, so I would not anticipate she would need anything from me. That's what makes it comfortable- she's part of my support system, but I'm not part of hers, that's where the money comes in, that's how I support her.
Still, when she tells me something unfortunate happened, i.e. was late once due to a car breakdown, I am sympathetic.
I think perhaps you're afraid of losing your therapist, it's sooooo easy for abandonment fears to rise up with them, and that's some of your feeling, which will hopefully ease as things get back to normal.