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T did say she would try not to touch the phone so we'll see next session. During yesterday's session she fidgeted with the phone but discussing it took the entire 45 minutes since the conversation was intermixed with the usual "how does this make you feel", "how does this translate to RL", "what's your history with this".
My thoughts on why I feel dismissed are in-line with what TinyRabbit wrote and why I have an issue of purely saying "okay" and moving on from this. Is it a power struggle as Hankster suggests, probably, but I don't know how to see my “wrong” in the situation. My wrong could be that I’m not willing to drop it therefore the power struggle is created. I don't need to be "right" though, that isn't my end goal. I’m open to alternate perspectives and learning, hence my question on PC.
I feel dismissed because I was very clear and proactive with addressing this and stating what I needed to resolve. I wasn’t passive, didn’t pout or take an aggressive approach. Some of us are in therapy because as children our thoughts and feelings were dismissed, we weren’t able to express what we wanted and have that need met. So here is an opportunity for me to learn that needs can be met when asking, in a healthy way, for what I want yet T is using this as the opposite, she’s asking me to keep “taking” the negative behavior I’ve been on the receiving end of for years. To accept that my wants aren’t as important or valid as the other persons and it’s okay to be treated that way. For no known reason my request is being dismissed and not taken seriously. Of course I’m going to internalize this as something is wrong with me, I’m not worth making a change for. I’m working on how I can change that faulty thinking.
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