View Single Post
 
Old Oct 25, 2013, 01:28 PM
tinyrabbit's Avatar
tinyrabbit tinyrabbit is offline
Grand Wise Rabbit
 
Member Since: Feb 2013
Location: England
Posts: 4,084
Quote:
Originally Posted by JayneJohnson49 View Post
I feel dismissed because I was very clear and proactive with addressing this and stating what I needed to resolve. I wasn’t passive, didn’t pout or take an aggressive approach. Some of us are in therapy because as children our thoughts and feelings were dismissed, we weren’t able to express what we wanted and have that need met. So here is an opportunity for me to learn that needs can be met when asking, in a healthy way, for what I want yet T is using this as the opposite, she’s asking me to keep “taking” the negative behavior I’ve been on the receiving end of for years. To accept that my wants aren’t as important or valid as the other persons and it’s okay to be treated that way. For no known reason my request is being dismissed and not taken seriously. Of course I’m going to internalize this as something is wrong with me, I’m not worth making a change for. I’m working on how I can change that faulty thinking.
Mm. This is why I have such a problem with it. There isn't something wrong with you, you are worth making a change for - but that's not the message you're getting from your T. Not because your worries are right, but because your T is putting herself, her needs and her boundaries first and not seeing you.

So I don't think it's the case that this "proves" you right, though you may feel like that. I think your T is behaving badly and it's not about you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by hankster View Post
Plus, I'm the fidgeter, not t.
But it's your session, not your T's. Interesting that he takes calls. If mine did, I think we'd have a year-long rupture...
Thanks for this!
Favorite Jeans, Rzay4, unaluna